Applause!

black-and-white-audienceOnce upon a time, peace reigned over the land…

People attended movies and plays and concerts everywhere and were perfectly civil in their behavior.  It was enjoyable to be a part of the audience and a good time was had by all.

Then, in the 1960’s, the Beatles landed in America and the deafening screams of their fans, mostly female, sang out across the land.  Girls fainted, security teams lost their hearing, and parents shook their heads in dismay at the foolishness of the youngsters.

After they calmed down, many years passed in relative audience decorum.  Polite clapping of the hands…the occasional standing ovation…and then came Oprah.  Every time she moved or gave away so much as a pair of socks, women screamed.

oprah-winfrey-cars-everybody-gets-a-car

Choruses of “WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!” rang out across the land disturbing the peace polite studio audiences everywhere.  No longer were the studio audience members able to politely clap their hands.  No longer could a guest be welcomed to a show without losing partial hearing in the process.

I must admit, the cause is more likely a physical one rather than a social one.  After all, how are we expected to clap our hands when they are filled with all sorts of electronic devices (which now seem to be actual appendages)?  I guess there was no other choice.

Thank heaven for the MUTE button.

 

 

 

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